Sculptures

An enjoyable afternoon spent wandering the sculpture garden at the Mill Brook Gallery in Concord, NH. Beautiful gardens and flowers, interesting sculptures. Gallery inside with paintings, mobiles.

There were some real horses on the adjacent site, but Joe didn't get to play with them this time. He's still doing some horse sitting and training, but the economy has put a damper on that part of his retirement. Many people are actually giving their horses away because they can't afford to feed them. Very sad.

Decisions....decisions....

This is a pen and ink sketch I am working on from my trip to Utah in June (11" X 15"). It is a view of Devil's Castle at the Alta ski area. It is on watercolor paper so I can add color, but now I have to make some decisions. If I paint it, I can't go back to black and white. I could paint it realistically (the tops of the mountains had snow on them, the sky was very bright blue, no clouds), or in fanciful colors, or just a little bit of color. Or, I could crop the picture and leave that big rock out of it. I could leave it black and white.

Meanwhile I sent a jpg file to my art teacher. I will be starting classes again in September and she said to just bring it in to discuss. So, I guess for the moment I will just leave it and think about it some more. I have lots of art supplies so I can always start a new picture.

I might take it to a shop with a bigger scanner (mine is too small to scan in) and then play with it on my computer. I wasn't able to get a good photo, the paper is actually quite white, but the photo shows up gray. I probably have to adjust something on my camera. Would be happy to have some reader comments, or you can send me a direct e-mail if you don't want to post on this blog. Thanks.

Later: The first image above was scanned at Kinko's. That is closer to the original.

Havurah Conference 2009 (Rindge, NH)

Just some photos from our vacation week. We had a wonderful time, but now I'm stressed with catching up with my work. We also had a chance to hike in Pisgah State Park. Beautiful hiking trails and views of Mt. Monadnock. The musicians were awesome!

missing you

the stones told the story
born in . . . died in . . .
a name
in Hebrew
in English
dates in both
but I only knew you
from stories
and old photos
immigrants to America
modestly dressed
in old-fashioned clothes
my bubbe
my zayde
gone before I made
my appearance in 1946

what would have changed
had I known you?
maybe I would be
more observant
more in tune with ritual
but I’m confortable
with my faith as is

yet I feel the lack
the emptiness inside
from that missed connection
when I hear Yiddish
or old Jewish melodies
I think about you
and realize that my mother
was a role model for me
as bubbe to my children
since I never knew my grandparents
so I cook
I teach
I listen
I tell stories
and I pass on the love
that I missed
but still have inside to give

draft copyright 2009 Linda H. Feinberg

On electronic retreat this week. No more blog entries this week.

Psalm 90:12

Another version that I found while cleaning up my office. I made a small card out of this one too. I will have cards and prints available next week in Rindge, NH at the Havurah Conference at Franklin Pierce University. Shuk is Wed., August 5th, 4-9 p.m. Joe will be there with his books for sale too.

Showy Penstemon Figwort

Just some pretty flowers from the Utah trip (Red Butte), beautiful botanical gardens. Not too sure about the name and spelling on the flowers.

From Minsk to America, 1914

a horse-drawn sleigh ride, a train,
then a ship from Hamburg, Germany
brought my father to America
leaving pogroms and the old life behind
his father and older sister already here
he was only seven, traveling with his mother,
brothers and sisters

other passengers heaving
not him, cast iron stomach
the first time he had enough to eat
they gave him their food
too seasick for it

and then, a childhood in poverty
his sisters quit school, taking factory jobs
so the brothers could finish high school
my father sold popcorn on the boardwalk
took college classes at night
and made it to the middle class
helping others whenever he could

yet he had so much anger inside
drinking let the sarcasm out
"battle-axe" "jerk" "stupid"
a rejecting kind of love
how little I knew of his inner struggle
until I fought my own demons inside
now I follow him while breaking the cycle
using words that heal
instead of words that hurt


copyright 2002 Linda H. Feinberg

My father was born in Minsk 7/15/1906, part of a set of twins "David" and "Solomon". I have been thinking about him this week since it would have been his birthday. At this point in my life, I have been able to make some peace in my mind about my issues with him. I think he had a very hard life and while I don't agree that someone should drink to ease the emotional pains they had, I do at least understand it a bit. He had many good qualities, too, and I've tried to focus more on them and learn from them, rather than the negative ones that caused me so much emotional pain as a child.

Powwow

We have two grandchildren visiting us from Mojave, California. They have never been here before and are enjoying seeing all the green trees. We'll take them on a whale watch soon. Meanwhile, they enjoyed the Indian Powwow in Warner, NH this past weekend. We also toured the Mt. Kearsarge Indian Museum.

I loved this quote from the brochure (10th Annual Intertribal Powwow):

"Grandmothers are even more sacred because they carry the heart and soul of the people. Grandmothers carry the sacred spirit of the Mother Earth. Grandmothers give us gentleness and caring because they have also given us life. Our elders teach us who are ancestors were. Our elders are our connection to everything in our past. It is with their knowledge that we understand how we fit into the world." Rick Williams

Beautiful thoughts and very much in tune with what I learned about respect (derech eretz) for Jewish elders as a child. I feel very blessed that I have grandchildren, even though biologically they are not mine. The biology does not seem to matter to my heart.

The other really enjoyable part about being a grandmother (or any parent) is that you get to do all the kid things without anybody making fun of you! I love that too.

More hiking pictures

Dina took some wonderful pictures of our hikes together. I hope this link works here: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=270814&id=691330617&l=f4f3fda9ef

Just finished a non-fiction book that some of my "senior" friends and family may be interested in, borrowed from the library: The Third Chapter, Passion, Risk, and Adventure in the 25 years after 50. By Sara Lawrence-Lightfoot. It was interesting to see how well I fit in with the people she wrote about. I started taking art classes about 10 years ago and I'm looking forward to retiring in three more years to I can do more with what I have learned. Joe started writing seriously in his 60's and now has his first novel out (with some very good reviews!).

While I certainly can't hike as well as I did 10 years ago, I am still appreciating what I can do and enjoying this stage of life.

Red Butte Gardens, Utah

IMG_8357
Originally uploaded by LHFeinberg

Beautiful botanical garden in Salt Lake City, Utah. More pictures: http://www.flickr.com/photos/40061738@N02/

Had a great visit with Dina, will write more about the hiking another time.