Showy Penstemon Figwort

Just some pretty flowers from the Utah trip (Red Butte), beautiful botanical gardens. Not too sure about the name and spelling on the flowers.

From Minsk to America, 1914

a horse-drawn sleigh ride, a train,
then a ship from Hamburg, Germany
brought my father to America
leaving pogroms and the old life behind
his father and older sister already here
he was only seven, traveling with his mother,
brothers and sisters

other passengers heaving
not him, cast iron stomach
the first time he had enough to eat
they gave him their food
too seasick for it

and then, a childhood in poverty
his sisters quit school, taking factory jobs
so the brothers could finish high school
my father sold popcorn on the boardwalk
took college classes at night
and made it to the middle class
helping others whenever he could

yet he had so much anger inside
drinking let the sarcasm out
"battle-axe" "jerk" "stupid"
a rejecting kind of love
how little I knew of his inner struggle
until I fought my own demons inside
now I follow him while breaking the cycle
using words that heal
instead of words that hurt


copyright 2002 Linda H. Feinberg

My father was born in Minsk 7/15/1906, part of a set of twins "David" and "Solomon". I have been thinking about him this week since it would have been his birthday. At this point in my life, I have been able to make some peace in my mind about my issues with him. I think he had a very hard life and while I don't agree that someone should drink to ease the emotional pains they had, I do at least understand it a bit. He had many good qualities, too, and I've tried to focus more on them and learn from them, rather than the negative ones that caused me so much emotional pain as a child.

Powwow

We have two grandchildren visiting us from Mojave, California. They have never been here before and are enjoying seeing all the green trees. We'll take them on a whale watch soon. Meanwhile, they enjoyed the Indian Powwow in Warner, NH this past weekend. We also toured the Mt. Kearsarge Indian Museum.

I loved this quote from the brochure (10th Annual Intertribal Powwow):

"Grandmothers are even more sacred because they carry the heart and soul of the people. Grandmothers carry the sacred spirit of the Mother Earth. Grandmothers give us gentleness and caring because they have also given us life. Our elders teach us who are ancestors were. Our elders are our connection to everything in our past. It is with their knowledge that we understand how we fit into the world." Rick Williams

Beautiful thoughts and very much in tune with what I learned about respect (derech eretz) for Jewish elders as a child. I feel very blessed that I have grandchildren, even though biologically they are not mine. The biology does not seem to matter to my heart.

The other really enjoyable part about being a grandmother (or any parent) is that you get to do all the kid things without anybody making fun of you! I love that too.

More hiking pictures

Dina took some wonderful pictures of our hikes together. I hope this link works here: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=270814&id=691330617&l=f4f3fda9ef

Just finished a non-fiction book that some of my "senior" friends and family may be interested in, borrowed from the library: The Third Chapter, Passion, Risk, and Adventure in the 25 years after 50. By Sara Lawrence-Lightfoot. It was interesting to see how well I fit in with the people she wrote about. I started taking art classes about 10 years ago and I'm looking forward to retiring in three more years to I can do more with what I have learned. Joe started writing seriously in his 60's and now has his first novel out (with some very good reviews!).

While I certainly can't hike as well as I did 10 years ago, I am still appreciating what I can do and enjoying this stage of life.

Red Butte Gardens, Utah

IMG_8357
Originally uploaded by LHFeinberg

Beautiful botanical garden in Salt Lake City, Utah. More pictures: http://www.flickr.com/photos/40061738@N02/

Had a great visit with Dina, will write more about the hiking another time.

Genesis 34:1

"and Dinah, daughter of Leah, whom she had borne to Jacob,
went out to see the daughters of the land." Genesis 34:1


for Dina, daughter of Hinda Leah


and she went forth from New Hampshire
to study meteorology at college in Vermont
where she met many fine daughters
on the slopes of Burke Mountain
and on the trails of Mounts Pisgah and Hor
and she sojourned there four years

she then journeyed many miles through New York and Canada
until she came to the state of Michigan
where she paused to rest and work for one year in Traverse City,
by the lake also called Michigan,
reporting on 200 inches of snow, the cherry festival,
other local issues and meeting many more daughters

she resumed her journey from Michigan,
through the flat lands of Indiana and Illinois,
past cities, farmhouses, fields and cattle
until she came to the beautiful green hills called Ozarks
in the state of Missouri
to work and play, predicting storms,
reporting on weather and other events,
and searching out the daughters of the land

(to be continued)

© 2002 Linda H. Feinberg

I never wrote the "to be continued part" of this poem, but my meteorologist daughter spent three years in Missouri and has now settled in Salt Lake City, Utah. I am off to visit her and see the sights. No blogging for the next week.

Rain, rain go away....

It feels like it has been raining forever. I did get out for a 45 minute walk this morning in between the raindrops. I took my camera with me. These are neighborhood photos, one of a dogwood tree, the other of lupines. I never had any success growing lupines myself, so I admire my neighbor's. Everything is very green because of the rain. Unfortunately, we also have mold (powdery mildew) in our back yard because of it. I prepared an organic spray yesterday from directions on the internet (1 part milk, 9 parts water in a spray bottle). It remains to be seen whether this works since it rained again after we put it on.

It's supposed to be summer here now, but it doesn't feel like it. Anyway, I'll probably be very warm this weekend since I'll be in Salt Lake City at the Utah Arts Festival (http://www.uaf.org/). Looking forward to hiking, art, time with family.

Cemeteries

If you are interested in looking for more information on the "Narajow" (in Yiddish, Narayev) area where my maternal grandparents came from, try this web site: http://www.personal.ceu.hu/students/97/Roman_Zakharii/zemla.htm

It is very informative.

We attended an unveiling this past weekend for my late uncle who passed away in October at the age of 98. I was able to visit with him last summer, but unable to attend the funeral. This was my way of saying good-bye, or as the psychologists say, having closure. He was a good man and my cousins did a beautiful job with their kind words and prayers at the cemetery.

The gates in the photo are at Mount Hebron cemetery in Flushing, NY. There were many gates in the cemetery, put up by the various burial societies or congregations for the immigrants. They reminded me of the words from Psalm 118 which we say in the Hallel prayers on Rosh Chodesh (new month) and holidays. My uncle passed away on rosh chodesh and I thought of these words... Pitchoo Li Shaari Zedek - "open the gates of the righteous for me..."

There is a beautiful chant to these words from Shlomo Carlebach. I did a painting of a gate with the calligraphy from these words when my mother passed away. For months before her death, and months after, I kept hearing the melody. I'm sure she and my uncle (brother and sister) are together now with the other righteous souls from our families.

Fishing

Saturday was free fishing day in New Hampshire. That means that I didn't need to buy a fishing license to go fishing. It rained the last few years on this day so I didn't take advantage of it, but yesterday was beautiful. We drove out to the Hopkinton-Everett Lake and dam in Weare, walked across the walkway and drowned some worms in the beautiful lake. I caught three sunfish and Joe caught two. We put them back in and enjoyed the sunlight and views, did a little walking on the trail. I guess this is part of the "staycation" theme the newspapers write about. A mini vacation close to home.

Sales for a non-sales type person

Joe & I enjoyed the Israeli festival on Sunday. He sold 10 books and I sold cards (but no prints or originals). I received lots of positive comments on my artwork, both on Sunday in Manchester and Friday night in Derry (Etz Hayim synagogue display).

While I am comfortable now selling my consulting and bookkeeping skills for my business (after more than 20 years of practice), I still do not have the self-confidence about my artwork. However, I did feel upbeat, especially when one of my former art teachers bought some cards! That was good for my ego.

It was interesting to me to see which designs sold. Some that were popular the last time I did a table did not sell at all this time. I now have a rotating card display rack, so that helped people look at the different cards. I'll be doing another market in August in Rindge, NH at the havurah retreat we'll be attending. I'm looking forward to that. It was good being next to Joe's table too, he kept my anxiety down to a manageable level.

Oh yes, the most popular card was the one that I have at the upper left on the blog (Teach us to treasure each day. . . ).